Domestic violence is a silent epidemic, and it can happen to anyone regardless of age, race, gender, religion, or economic status. It does not discriminate.

Domestic abuse is a disease. It is like cancer. And like cancer, can spread to weaken every facet of one's being. This is a situation that no one ever wants to experience. But the reality is, that it happens every day.

Children, servants, or the elderly can be victims of domestic violence, but our beam is on intimate partner violence.
This genre takes place between supposed romantically connected people.

You may be the one who is being abused or you may be the one who is doing the abusing – unfortunately.

There are many types of domestic violence, including physical and verbal abuse, sexual assault, stalking, and financial abuse. All these forms of abuse are dangerous to an individual's health and well-being.

Intimate partner violence does not happen to women alone; there are men who suffer from this type of violence as well.

Men are often taught to be dominant, aggressive, and assertive – a way of being that reflects their gender identity. They are socialized into believing that they are superior to women in every way possible: mentally tougher; able to control their emotions better than women can; etc.

Particularly, It is expected that since a man has superior muscular strength when compared to his female counterpart, then she should be at his beck and call.
These stereotypes have come to work against the abused male as he is unlikely to report any form of domestic abuse.

However, away from the minute occurrences of men in abusive relationships, a claim has it that it is a man's world.

From Pakistan to Chibok, men are wielding guns and yelling to women about how to live their lives. What they can do and cannot do. How they should dress and how far they ought to progress.
What goes unnoticed in most homes is a microcosm of larger societal happenings.
This is not to be critical of men.

Anxiety, flashbacks, low-self esteem, depression, high suicidal tendencies in women, and fear of intimacy are some gruesome impacts of domestic violence.

Ultimately, domestic abuse results in the death of the abused person.

According to Daily Trust, 49 spousal killings occurred between January 2021 and March 2022. Out of this tally, 35 husbands murdered their wives, while the residual amount represents the number of wives that neutralized their husbands.

Mrs Anulika Uguru and Mrs Osinachi Nwachukwu are examples of Nigerian women who gave it all to life, society, and their spouses, enduring domestic violence until they breathed their last.

Following practical steps to manage the issue of intimate partner violence should be every woman's priority – the threatened African woman to be precise.

These steps will assist an abused lady to subdue the challenge posed by domestic violence.



1) Decipher Your Case

An attitude is our assessment of ourselves, other people, ideas, and objects in our world (Petty et al., 1997).

An abusive partner's attitude is influenced by the sum of experiences that he has accumulated coming from infancy, and as a result, holds certain beliefs.

Past occurrences that influence an abusive partner's attitude include the following:

◦ Childhood trauma (such as abuse).

◦ Lack of education about healthy relationships.

◦ Lack of awareness around what constitutes abuse.

Present entanglements that influence an abusive partner's attitude include the following:

◦ Gambling.

◦ Drug abuse.

◦ Involvement with Ponzi schemes.

◦ Consumption of entertainment that promotes violence (sports shows, video games, etc).

You are to know both who you are dealing with and the mix of factors that influences them to act the way they do. This makes it easier for you to confront the situation.



2) Reach Out

If you're a victim of domestic violence, you should not go alone in handling the matter.

Engage actively in the following:

◦ Submit your supplications to God in prayer. God knows how best to deal with everyone, and you can find out more.

◦ Boldly engage your partner in a heart-to-heart talk. Let your partner know the impact of his actions on you. Discuss details of facts that you gathered while deciphering your case.

◦ Seek out resources that will help you gain a better understanding of your situation.

◦ Talk to a confidant.

◦ Consult a marriage counsellor. These are people who want to hear your story – and they want answers too!

3) Take a Stand

Your encounter with domestic violence should not terminate after you end up in a body bag.

If the situation continues or escalates after you have reached out as outlined above, it is obvious that you need some time away from your abusive partner.

You might want to consider your kids, the opinion of your relatives, and the impending taunts and jeers from members of the various groups that you participate in, but what about the most important person – you?


Conclusion

Domestic violence victims (fatality cases) tend to be people who were unable to safely escape their abusers before the biblical cock crowed thrice.

You should recognize the signs of this form of abuse, develop a support system, and confidently overcome the challenge.

Do not fall under the category of women who do not know how to stay a lady after marrying a man.

Act decisively.

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